Notes: So! Here we have two thousand words of almost nothing but sex. Rating is R, folks, don’t read it if you don’t like it. Finally. FINALLY! I hope you enjoy, darlins.
I’m thinking we’re about half done with the story at this point—this is turning into a full-fledged novel. I’m so glad you’re sticking with it:)
Title: Love Letters
Part Fifteen: Close Is Never Close Enough
Ryan was a very tactile person. Ben already knew that, he’d known it from practically the first moment they’d met. He’d experienced it full-body last night, when Ryan had latched onto him and had to be pried off. Touching, Ben had been expecting. Kissing, absolutely. But the diving in and working to strip him out of his clothes almost before the door was closed, not quite. Ben wasn’t great with people in general, but he thought he was pretty good with Ryan at this point, and he recognized nerves when they were directed at him. Ryan being pushy was fine, but Ryan being nervous wasn’t what Ben wanted.
Ben put his hands over Ryan’s, which were beneath his undershirt and hot against his bare chest. “Mind if we slow down?” he asked.
“Yes,” Ryan said, and pressed their mouths together harshly. Ben moved his hands up to cradle Ryan’s jaws on both sides and gentled the kiss, stepping back from tongue and teeth and making them go slower. He let Ryan press him against the door, let him push their bodies together but didn’t grind or grip, just held onto him and kissed until the quivering tension that had been driving Ryan ebbed away, and they were left with deep, wet kisses and arms that held each other close, dipping under the edges of clothes and caressing what was beneath but not going further, not yet.
Ryan tasted like warmth and metal, and running the tip of his tongue across the back of the labrum piercing sent a tingle down Ben’s spine. Ryan moaned and sighed into his mouth, desperate desire giving way to something tender. He held onto Ben like Ben was something rare and precious and hard to come by, which with anyone else would have irritated Ben. He had no illusions about himself, and he knew he wasn’t any of those things. But to Ryan, maybe he was. Maybe Ben could be a little bit more to Ryan, just like Ryan was so much more to Ben than just another guy to fuck.
Oh, hell. Ben shuddered involuntarily at the thought of actually fucking Ryan. Ben preferred to top, if he was going to get that intimate with another man, and the very idea of Ryan spread out beneath him begging for it, the tight heat of his ass and the feeling of those legs wrapped around his waist…it was almost enough to make Ben come right there, in his pants, against the wall before they even got to the bed. And wasn’t the whole point of them not being on the bed yet to slow this thing down?
Well, there was slow and then there was glacial. Ben leaned back and gave them space to speak. Before he could say anything though, Ryan did.
“I know I haven’t done a good job of selling you on this yet,” he murmured, staying close enough that their lips brushed as he spoke. “But I actually am really good at sex.”
“I don’t doubt it,” Ben told him with complete honesty. “Want to show me more of what you’re good at?”
“I’d love to, but first I’d really like you to be naked,” Ryan said with a lascivious smile. He went after Ben’s shirt again, but slower this time. His eyes raked over each newly bared inch of skin, hungry for revelation. Ben knew he looked good—not fabulous, but good—and he let Ryan look as long as he wanted, let his fingers rove and lips trace and didn’t think for a second about how he’d never taken the time to do this with another person before. Even when Ben went slow with a guy, it was usually more about slow hand jobs, slow blowjobs, slow but overtly sexual acts. With Ryan he just wanted to give his body over and let the younger man explore to his heart’s content, and even though Ben’s control was decidedly strained by the time Ryan was kneeling in front of him, pulling his briefs down over his hips and leaving them in a heap on the floor with the other clothes, he didn’t let the slow strip end there.
“My turn.” Ben pulled Ryan to his feet (a little reluctantly on Ryan’s part, who had been eyeing Ben’s cock like he was wondering if he could take it all in one long swallow) and tugged him over to the edge of the bed. Ben sat down and pulled Ryan between his legs, and now it was his turn to trace the lines of Ryan’s stomach with curious fingertips, and taste the taut points of his nipples as Ben gradually tugged Ryan’s t-shirt up and over his head.
Ryan swayed forward, his hands clenched tight on Ben’s shoulders. When Ben went for the fly of his jeans Ryan put a hand down and stopped him. “If you take those off, if you even just…if you just touch me there, I swear to God, I’ll come right now. I’ve…I’ve kind of been thinking about this for a long time.”
Ben felt strangely flattered, and he wasn’t sure if he liked the feeling or not. He wasn’t vain enough to find the idea of someone pining over him gratifying. He had to say something, though. “I’d really like to watch you come,” he told Ryan, mouthing over his smooth, nearly hairless chest. “We’ll be at this for a while, so don’t hold back on my account.” His hand hovered over Ryan’s jeans. “Can I take them off now?”
“Fuck, okay,” Ryan breathed. He kept his arms looped around Ben’s shoulders and shut his eyes as Ben slowly began to open him up. Ryan’s underwear was somewhere between hideous and delightful, lime-green but so silky that Ben couldn’t resist reaching around and cupping Ryan’s ass, pulling his legs flush against the edge of the bed.
Ryan’s breath hitched loudly. He moaned and moved even further forward, getting his knees up on the bed next to Ben’s hips and straddling Ben’s bare thighs. He was so hard beneath the bright fabric that when Ben slid a hand around to the front and tugged at the hem, the crown of Ryan’s cock pushed free immediately. It was slick and shining, and Ben just had to touch it. He circled his thumb around the head, smoothing out the liquid gathered there, and that was it for Ryan. He cried out like he was breaking, grabbed Ben so hard he could feel his shoulder blades squeeze against the sides of his spine, and came all over Ben’s hand.
Ben bared his teeth against Ryan’s shoulder and desperately clamped down on the surge in his blood that came with Ryan so abandoned in his arms. He was not going to let go out of some sympathetic reaction to Ryan’s orgasm, even though he wanted to so fucking badly he was literally seeing stars.
“Oh my god,” Ryan sighed eventually. “Damn, it’s like I’m fourteen again around you.”
Ben laughed weakly. “I’m really glad you’re not fourteen; that would make this so wrong.”
“Just figuratively speaking, writer-man,” Ryan said. He took Ben’s hand and wiped it off against his jeans, then pulled them the rest of the way off, along with the underwear.
Ben nudged the lime green fabric with his feet. “Were those your idea?”
“They were a gift from Jasmine two years ago for my birthday. I’ve got them in chemical orange, hot pink and electric blue, too.” Ryan put his hands on Ben’s chest and pushed him onto his back. “But I’m really a lot more interested in you right now than old birthday presents.” They climbed a ways up the bed, until Ben’s head was on a pillow. Ryan hovered over him, still a little unsteady from his orgasm but looking at Ben with hunger. His bright blue irises were barely visible around the blown circles of his pupils. “I want to suck you.”
Ben’s cock throbbed and he snuck a hand down and circled the base tightly, holding himself back. “Sounds good,” he managed, “but that also won’t last very long at this point.”
“I don’t want you to last,” Ryan said, kissing Ben’s forehead, then his cheek, then his lips, brief moments of skin on skin that left glowing points of heat lingering on Ben’s face. “I want to taste you.”
“Okay,” Ben agreed quickly. “That’s so okay with me.”
Ryan grinned cheekily. “Good.” Then he lowered himself onto Ben’s body and slid down until his lips were wrapped around Ben’s cock, and Ben promptly traded his higher brain functions for the sheer amazing pleasure of Ryan’s mouth and tongue.
Ryan was right; he was really good at this. He didn’t start off slow, just jumped in and took Ben as deeply as he could, almost all the way down to the base, before sliding back up. He sucked hard along the shaft and rolled his tongue across the head and Ben wanted to watch those gorgeous lips stretched around him, red and plump and way too tempting, but his control was strained to the breaking point as it was. Ben closed his eyes and focused on breathing, touching Ryan’s head and neck, not even tempted to try to direct his movements because honestly, there was no way Ben could improve on this.
The pleasure he felt crested higher and higher, and his breathing got heavier, the air thick like syrup in his lungs. “Ryan…”
It was meant to be a warning but Ryan took it more like encouragement, wrapping one hand around the base of Ben’s cock and jacking him fast as he swirled his tongue around the head. Ben’s eyelids squeezed together so tight it hurt and he didn’t even recognize his own voice in those hoarse, throaty sounds as he came, his hips thrusting up uncontrollably. Everything from the crown of his head to the tips of his toes was taut with way more sensation than his brain could handle, and finally Ben stopped trying to analyze and just let it happen. Turning his brain off was a challenge at the best of times, but it seemed like Ryan was the cure for that.
Afterwards his whole body felt warm and relaxed, almost like he was floating in a pool of water. Ben drowsed for a few moments, only coming back to himself when he felt Ryan move back up his body. He was hot like a brand, and hard again, and Ben didn’t even have to think about it, he just spread his legs further apart and welcomed Ryan into the cradle of them, hissing a little when their lengths brushed together. Ben felt oversensitive and exhausted, but he wouldn’t have moved Ryan away for the world.
Ryan kissed him, nipping at his lower lip. His hips jerked in tiny little thrusts. “I need to come again,” he whispered. “Can I? Just like this?”
Ben was well and truly spent, there was no way he could get it up again so fast, but he had no problem with Ryan getting off again. “Yes,” he replied. “Of course. Just like this.” Ben wrapped his legs around Ryan’s hips and urged him on.
It was a little clumsy, rocking together without any set rhythm, lips connecting and then separating as Ryan gasped, but it didn’t need to be perfect to be so, so good. Ben listened to Ryan’s need build, heard it in every new breath and rolling grind of them together, and he held onto Ryan the way he knew the younger man wanted, tight, possessive, like he’d never let him go. There was more truth to that than Ben was comfortable confronting, and he shoved it aside in favor of watching Ryan come again.
Ryan looked like he was dying in ecstasy, a painted martyr, beautiful in his agony. Ryan didn’t hold anything back, free of self-conscious doubt and worry, and Ben loved every second of it. The wet heat of Ryan’s release splashed onto his stomach and groin, instantly smearing between their bodies, and under normal circumstances that would make Ben cringe, but right now all it felt was good. Fitting. Like being marked as taken, in a way.
Ryan finally came back down to earth, his head falling gracelessly against Ben’s shoulder. “Holy shit,” he mumbled.
“Yeah,” Ben agreed, stroking Ryan’s back.
“Mmmnn…need to…clean up.”
“Yeah, in a minute.” Ben didn’t want to let go just yet, and he knew Ryan didn’t want to move. Ryan’s entire body was lax and heavy, a burden that Ben didn’t mind bearing for a while. “In a minute.”
A few minutes later, they were both asleep.